Sunday, 12 June 2011

Jeepers Creepers II (2003)

Written by Axemaster June 12 2011
Rating 5.5 out of 10

Director   -   Victor Salva

Ray Wise  -  Jack Taggart Sr.
Nicki Aycox  -  Minxie Hayes
Jonathan Breck   -   The Creeper
Garikayi Mutambirwa  -  Deaundre
Eric Nenninger   -   Scotty Braddock

 Hey there all you Creeper Crazies !!! Axemaster's back in the Dungeon tonight , with , well , I'm here with some bad news ......... Jeepers Creepers II ........
"Nothing .. Just Hanging around !"
Isn't as good as the original ! It suffers quite a bit from ..... Sequelitus !!!
  Here's the story line in  a nut shell ....................

 Open on a golden farm field . Little Billy Taggart is getting ragged on by his dad , Jack . Old Jack wants Billy to get their Three Scarecrows all wired up to their posts to keep the birds at bay . Billy fixes up numbers one and two , but when he gets to number three ..... He finds out that the "Scarecrow" is Way Scarier than he thought ! The Creeper Jumps poor old Billy , and drags him off into the Field !! (Oh NO!! ) Old Jack and Billies brother Jack Jr. put up a good fight , but hey ...... This is the Creeper we're talking about here !! If you haven't already seen the Original ...... The Creeper can fly ! Basically ..... Billies a goner !!
"Why couldn't we have been in the original !?"
"Oh My God ! This is So Predictable !"
      Cut to a view of good old East Highway 9 . (aka The Lonesome Road of Death !!) A big yellow school bus is trundling its way up the road . Its loaded with Jocks who just won the state championships for Basketball (Yawn!) They're singing their pep rally tune (as though they haven't already heard enough of that shit !) and having a great time celebrating Their victory ! All of them that is but Scotty . Scotty is the super serious brooding guy who feels he and the team could have done better ! ( Guy needs to get laid more !) So ...... We have a bus load of kids , and their coaches ..... (Great body count filler wouldn't you say !?) The Bus gets a Not so mysterious flat tire , (A Throwing Star made of human bone !!!DUH !) and our hapless gang of athletes are stranded on the road of death !! By the way ...... Its Day 23 of the Creepers 23 day feasting cycle , which only comes every 23 years . Its also only a couple days after the original flicks time line . So the gang know all about Trish and Darry Jenners ordeal , and the Church of the Dead !! So Yup !! You Guessed it ..... The Creepers Real Hungry !! With a capital "H" !! And ... Yup ! You Guessed it again Fright Fans !!!! Our gangs sidelined bus is his Buffet Dinner ! We now enter into the "One By One" Pick Off section of this forgettable film .
"Wait a minute ! This is Horror!?"
   This time out Director Victor Salva seems to think The Creeper would make a better comic presence , than the Kick Ass , Weird mystery dude he was in Jeepers Creepers I ! But thats how Sequelitus works folks !! Forget the story ..... Grab the Cash !!
   Don't get me wrong ...... I've watched way worse in my time , but the let down from the Awesome Original is what really hurts this flick .
    However Faithful Gore Ghouls ......... Mine is only to review !! The rest , well thats up to You !! Grab your bowl , and fill it with popcorn , and You , be the judge !

"Token flashy weapons to beat the boredom !"
             Until We meet Again in the Darkness ........

               Remember ........... If your ever on a bus full of Jocks .

                  Bring an Air Freshener !!!!!! 

No comments:

Post a Comment