Friday, 30 September 2011

Drag Me To Hell (2009)

Written by Axemaster September 30 2011
Rating 8 out of 10

Director   -   Sam Raimi

Alison Lohman   -   Christine Brown
Justin Long        -    Clay Dalton
Lorna Raver      -    Sylvia Ganush
Dileep Rao       -     Rham Jas
David Paymer  -     Mr. Jacks

                              Hey there all you Hellacious Horror Hounds !!
 Axemasters back from holidays , and I've dug up a real treat in the dungeon for you tonight !.......... Drag Me To Hell !!!! Bbrrrrrr  !!
This one is from master Raimi and is a nod to the Evil Dead flicks for sure ! Almost like he made it to keep us hoping that by the time he gets around to making Evil Dead 4 , his old pal Bruce will still look good with his shirt torn half off !!
"We told you to stop Picking it !!!"
   Here's the story line in a nut shell .....................

     The flick opens with a scene from 1969 . A car pulls up to an old
mansion (Picture the Munsters or the Adams Family !) and a hispanic couple take their son in to see the resident , Shaun San Dena . She is a powerful psychic , and they are hoping that she can help their son . Its seems the little bugger stole a silver necklace from a Gypsy wagon , and they put a curse on him !! ( Crime never pays kids ! And Gypsies no less !! Good Lord !) They bring him into the house and Shaun San Dena prepares to do battle with the spirit that has claimed the little Klepto's soul !
"Lucky 7's !! This is gonna be my night !"
    However , Shaun San Dena is unprepared for the power of this demon , and in a grippingly gruesome scene , our young sticky fingered friend , is , Yup You Guessed it !! Dragged screaming to HELL !!! Jeeze !! What an intro !!
   Flash forward to the present time . Lovely Christine Brown is driving to work at the bank , practicing her diction , and dreaming of being promoted to Assistant Manager of her branch . The spot is open , and she's tired of being just a loan officer . She wants to prove that she's got what it takes . She gets to work and asks her boss Mr. Jacks about the position . To her dismay , he tells her that the spot is still open , but newcomer Stu Rubin is in competition for the post with her ! Its seems that Old Stu isn't afraid to "Make Tough Decisions" . Which apparently Mr. Jacks is implying , She Is !! Christine assures Mr. Jacks that she too can make the tough
"I eat Loan Officers for lunch !! "
decisions , and sets out to prove it to her boss . This is when we meet Sylvia Ganush ! ( Bbrrrrr !! ) Christine has gone for her lunch and met her boyfriend Clay , who works at the University , and on the way back , she has picked up Mr. Jacks and Stu's lunches ! ( Oh the humanity !) She's a bit pissed and more determined to prove herself . Enter Mrs. Ganush .
   Old Mrs. Ganush is a elderly Gypsy woman , who has come in for an extension on her mortgage . Her Third extension on her Mortgage to be exact !  See where we're going with this ?? Yup ! You Guessed it ! Christine decides she's going to make a tough decision right there and not grant Mrs. Ganush the extension ! ( Gulp ! You Gotta be careful with them Gypsies man !! )
    When Mrs. Ganush hears that Christine isn't going to help her out
"Clatoo!! Verata !! oops !
Wrong Flick ! Sorry !"
She creates a scene in the bank . She gets on her knees and begs Christine for the extension . Christine , retreats from the old woman who is clinging to her , pleading for mercy of the financial kind ! As Christine backs away , the old bat falls over , and Christine calls for security !! When the guards come to escort her out , Mrs. Ganush can't believe that Christine has "Shamed" her . She flips her lid and goes from Little Old Lady to caged Tiger in a flash !!! The Guards throw her out and see her into her giant old Chevy ( Ever See Evil Dead Folks !!) , and Mr. Jacks is impressed with this show of "tough Decision" making . (Figures a banker would love it when someone gets tossed out of their home !) At the end of the day , as the bank empties out ,
Christine heads down into the parking garage . As she walks towards her own car , she notices a Giant old Chevy parked on the opposite side of the parking Garage !! ( Gulp !)
"I'm feeling like a bit Under the
weather ! About six feet !"
  Christine hurries into her car and as she looks around at a strange floating handkerchief thats drifting over her trunk , she see's the ghostly
outline of Mrs. Ganush in her back seat !! (Boy She's Ugly !) The fight scene that ensues is Hilarious , and you can tell that Sam Raimi and company still love to have fun when they make horror films ! At one point , Christine floors the car and rams it into a parked car ! Mrs. Ganush , Not wearing her seat belt ( Tisk Tisk Kids ! ) smacks her face on the dash and her dentures Explode out of her mouth ! Then , as the two grapple inside the smalls vehicle , Mrs. Ganush gums Christine's chin and face ! (Yuck ! Gross !) The battle ends with Mrs. Ganush pulling Christine out of the cars , and tearing a Button off her coat !! She utters something and breathes on the button , then hands it back to a badly shaken Christine ! Mrs. Ganush tells our  cute little Loan Officer ..........................
" Do I have Onion Breath !??"
"Soon , it will be You , who comes to Me , to Beg !"
The old Bat walks off , leaving Christine in a heap . The cops arrive and later so does Clay . Clay assures her that Mrs. Ganush is just a crazy old lady , and they try to laugh things off . However , in the next day Christine begins to feel that strange things are happening to her !
She begins to see shapes in the shadows , and hear voices in the wind !
  Will our heroine find out what has befallen her !?? Will There be an answer to the strange happenings that begin to dog her every move !!??? Will Mrs. Ganush ever get that Third Dammed  Extension on her Mortgage !????? I'll Never Tell Horror Hounds !! You'll have to watch this one yourselves to get the answers !
   Drag Me To Hell is a very entertaining Horror Film . You can't really call it an out and out Horror Comedy , but as I've mentioned Master Raimi keeps it light in spots , and very Evil Dead IIish !
Lets hope he gets over the big budget stuff and puts out a real screamer again some time soon !
 Well , its getting dark Down here in the Dungeon !
 Until we meet again in the darker places  ............................

                                  Stay Scared !! 

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